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LADIES: 8 SECRETS NEVER TO KEEP IN A RELATIONSHIP

 

1.  You've maxed out the credit cards and you're the only one who sees the bills every month--Secretly spending and trying to hide the purchases is a big indicator that there's not a lot of trust in your relationship. Try to figure out why you're not disclosing what you buy. Do you feel that your decisions are being ridiculed? Does your husband tend to control the majority of the money or your relationship overall? Or do you have a problem with compulsive spending? Then, come clean. Use this mistake as an opportunity to get on the same page about not just money, but also about how to communicate and stand by your wants and needs.

 

2. You've been sexually unsatisfied... for a while--Telling your man that you've been faking it would devastate him. Instead, approach him with a new fantasy that you'd like try. It's natural that passion ebbs and flows in a relationship and just because it's on the low-end right now doesn't mean that situation's permanent.

 

3. Something he said in that last argument really did matter--and you didn't say anything. Now you feel like you've been hiding feelings of resentment--Over time, bottling up your emotions creates resentment, which can lead to feeling angry with your partner. Ultimately, if you don't express yourself, you'll just lash out at each other and say hurtful things that you really don't mean. Start by fessing up to why you're still upset and work to clear the air. Then move on by developing guidelines for how to argue more productively, such as a no-name-calling rule.

 

4, Something from your past has come to haunt you, and it was so long ago that you never clued him in--Some not-so-classy pictures from a spring-break fling have found their way onto Facebook. Or that time you got arrested in college all of a sudden popped up on a Google search of your name. It's not easy, but it's better to fill your man in before he discovers this stuff on his own. When you don't share your past experiences as they come up, you miss an opportunity to get your partner's support and feel closer.

 

5. You've started to feel down... way down--Depression interferes with your ability to engage with others and tune into them. It will definitely affect your ability to be a really loving partner. An important step in coming out of depression is connecting with your partner. So tell your man that you've been sinking into a bad place, and that you don't know what to do about it.

 

 

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